She Bangs the Drums!

Today, Jennifer and I celebrated 16 years of marriage. I had planned to take her to Copenhagen but alas Covid-19 had other ideas. Instead we took a brief stroll in the sunshine through one of the local parks and spent the rest of the day in our apartment. We cooked together; watched Teen Wolf1 and reflected on the many happy years we have spent together so far.

I love Jennifer just as much today as the day I first laid eyes on her. She was a sophomore at College of Charleston, South Carolina; I was participating in an overseas placement as part of my American Studies degree. It was love at first sight. There were butterflies; nervous dates; and many long conversations sharing our passions and interests with each other.

While we have a few songs that we call our own, the one that most reminds me of Jennifer is ‘She Bangs the Drums’ by The Stone Roses. It perfectly captures how I felt every time I saw her back in Charleston when we started dating; and it continues to capture how I feel now, 20 years later. I’ll let Ian Brown and John Squire take it from here:

I don’t feel too steady on my feet
I feel hollow, I feel weak
Passion fruit and holy bread
Fill my guts and ease my head
Through the early morning sun
I can see her here she comes

She bangs the drums

Have you seen her have you heard
The way she plays there are no words
To describe the way I feel

How could it ever come to pass

She’ll be the first she’ll be the last
To describe the way I feel
The way I feel

I look forward to the next sixteen years of marriage, knowing she will be the first and last to describe the way I feel!

  1. Teen Wolf was on the TV the night we got married. We have watched it on our anniversary every year since. Perfect for a couple who love all things 80s.[]


“Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created… It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world… It is discovering what marriage can be, at its best.”

My wife, quoting Wilferd A. Peterson, captures exactly how we both feel after fifteen delightful years of marriage.

For my own part, what I know is this: I would be lost without her… half a soul, bereft of purpose and direction; like a ship gone adrift at sea. She is my north star; my guiding light; my personal GPS. As long as she is with me I will always find my way.

Here’s to fifteen more years, indeed!